Hoof in mouth disease
Jamel went to the building museum the other day, he said he made a ladder there. He came back with a scrap of PVC pipe and a long strip of some fibrous material. He was playing with them in front of my cottage. He pounded the pipe into my yard and made a big hole in my yellow and brown weeds that pass for a lawn. I told him to stop.
Whereupon he put the fiber strip into the pipe and flung the pipe overhand and the fiber strip flew out of the pipe and traveled about a hundred feet.
"Wow, I said, very impressed, that was really cool, it's a spearchukker!" Then I covered my mouth with my hands and looked around to make sure nobody had heard. God, I hope he doesn't repeat it!
But it gets worse. I was tearing up the vines smothering my cottage and Jamel came outside and started to sweep up the vines I had pulled down. He often mows my lawn, for monetary gain. His grandma came over and said, "Are you helping her do yard work?"
So I said, "Well, that's pretty much all they're good for." Then as I thought about what I had just said, I scrambled for cover. "Uh, kids, I mean, that's all kids are good for, heh, heh."